Mirrors and Windows

I have found myself growing wary recently of the trends
In which some girls claim to be just like every other girl.

The days of not being like other girls died sometime after flannel went out of fashion 
And all the cool girls left tumblr behind for the losers and the queers.
Now, the cool girls are loving taylor swift and twilight again.
They are making friendship bracelets and going op shopping.
They are making up for lost time, condemning the days in which they were divided. 

There is something real there.
I see it in their faces and I hear it in the harmonies of the well-worn lyrics
I feel it in knowing that I am like a lot of other girls. 
I recognise my reflections in them through the screen and across the lecture theatre.
I love a good rom-com. I love a sweet treat. I love complaining about bleeding and getting knowing nods from friends.
When I was five, I refused to wear any outfit that wasn’t pink. 
I get the idea, I promise I do. 

But I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. 
I keep thinking about the girls who never liked pink
The girls who hate pop music
The girls who play rugby and break bones and cry ugly.
I think of the girls who cannot afford the vanilla iced latte with oat milk.
I think of the girls who never had a choice in whether or not they fit in.
I think of the girls on tv who taught me that sometimes they can kiss each other
I think of the girls I made up in my head to double-check that I wanted to
I think of the butch girls and the autistic girls and the girls who are maybe not girls. 
I think of the girls who never bled, the girls who want to be girls so bad it hurts
I think of the girls who hate being a girl. The girls who find it all too much to bear.
I think of the girls under rubble.
I think of all the girls who were robbed of a chance to find their own shade of femininity.

I am not just like every other girl.
But I love girls. I’m obsessed with girls. I want to scream for girls. I want to fight for girls.
I want to turn the world upside down for girls, even when 
                                                                                             (especially when) 
                                                                                                                       we are nothing alike.