After Jenna Gribbon’s Me Looking At Her Looking At Me, 2018
There was no love in a past life / this is the first / That’s why / I want you so much / Do not need a thousand yards / I have plenty / Your eyes alone will take me / all my life, to explore / You could / be my angel number / jaywalk on my heart / hold me between you lips / like the final smoke of the night / something you’ll miss when it’s over / You make wanting so damn easy / You make wanting so damn heartbreaking / You twist and pull on sections of your hair while talking / and say my name in the middle of a sentence / Everything about you is gentle / it makes me want to die right there / What choice do I have?
I am the bird, you are the nest / Every room in this home is ours / I am always looking / Write poetry with my eyes closed as a way of seeing / Watching even in my sleep / Always wonder / what you see / How I can make it better for you / How could I ever take any of it / How could I deserve to own it / When you touch me, it needs to feel real / I will serve you the full moon on a cheese platter, and mean it / We’ll taste every bite / Don’t want you to doubt / My greatest performance is / holding you tenderly / and holding myself back / Did I do it right today? / I am true when I say / it’s all for you, baby / My slik facade is our raincoat, a blessing / Integrity too hot / It’ll hurt your sweet heart / Ribbon all around the world / never touching dense iron
You are the knife, I am the flesh / Open your Christmas present early because I need to feel it / Somebody loves you / Somebody loves you / Somebody loves you / Let it rattle around my brain / Make its way into my body / Hold it for a bit / Cover me like a blanket / Cough it up / Never taste it / Never savor / Never let it kill me / Like a statue of the Virgin Mary / I shed real tears / Crying during intimacy / is my only duty / Always a mourner at a funeral that hasn’t even started / You let me complain about myself / say it’s okay / that you love me anyway / You’ll keep saying it / till you don’t mean it anymore / How could it be real, for me? / I am an unnatural beholder / It is always me looking at you looking at me
The artwork that inspired this piece is currently still under copyright, you can view it online here. The featured artwork in its place was commissioned by bad apple from Mickie Loof for the 2023 Phantom Billstickers National Poetry Day.